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Pinkie

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Pinkie in the Pink Palace
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Reply with quote  #26 
Michele, I had missed your "Alan stories," but this one makes me feel sad ("hasn't spoken to either of his parents in years"). Reminds me of feeling sad when ali mentioned she doesn't speak to some of her siblings who live "just around the corner" from her. One of my sisters is currently peeved at me for pointing out Trump's destructive foibles and actions on my f.b. page, all the time. For reasons unknown, although highly educated, she's a Cheeto fan. I hope this doesn't drive us apart. I told her we're still family although I'm much more liberal and she seem to assent. 
My niece's soon to be father in law (I don't think that's very far off) is a Scandinavian American from Ohio who relocated to the Virginia coast, didn't like being landlocked and loves to be out on the ocean and visit tropical islands and such. He's conservative but seems nice, believes in hard work. He's a self-employed builder and his wife is a real estate agent originally from New Jersey. They're good people. My niece's boyfriend is their only child and they're gaga over him. Knocked me over w/ a feather when they apparently approved of her and him moving in together. And my sister (her mother) approved. I would not want her living by herself anyway. I'll be glad when they make it legal, though. Been going together for about five years now. 

__________________
"more sinned against than sinning"--shall be on my tombstone

"Transpersonal psychology--transcend the self, to abolish and avoid pain...what is the self, anyway?"--Pinkie
"Queen of Pain, I'll Always be Queen of Pain" (laughs)with apologies to Sting
"Yes it's over now, drink your big black cow, and get outa here"--Steely Dan
"I'm just a girl, they think I'm some kind of freak"--Gwen Stefani
"You can beat us with wires, you can beat us with chains;
You can make all your rules but you can't outrun the history train...I seen a glorious day"--Paul Simon
michele

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Reply with quote  #27 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pinkie
Michele, I had missed your "Alan stories," but this one makes me feel sad ("hasn't spoken to either of his parents in years"). Reminds me of feeling sad when ali mentioned she doesn't speak to some of her siblings who live "just around the corner" from her. One of my sisters is currently peeved at me for pointing out Trump's destructive foibles and actions on my f.b. page, all the time. For reasons unknown, although highly educated, she's a Cheeto fan. I hope this doesn't drive us apart. I told her we're still family although I'm much more liberal and she seem to assent. 
My niece's soon to be father in law (I don't think that's very far off) is a Scandinavian American from Ohio who relocated to the Virginia coast, didn't like being landlocked and loves to be out on the ocean and visit tropical islands and such. He's conservative but seems nice, believes in hard work. He's a self-employed builder and his wife is a real estate agent originally from New Jersey. They're good people. My niece's boyfriend is their only child and they're gaga over him. Knocked me over w/ a feather when they apparently approved of her and him moving in together. And my sister (her mother) approved. I would not want her living by herself anyway. I'll be glad when they make it legal, though. Been going together for about five years now. 


Hi Ms. Pinkie,

I think a lot of people have family issues, and it is what it is. Don't feel sad on my account, though. Allan's decision was a rational one, and sometimes when something is toxic, you have to seperate yourself from the situation.

I have a half-sister that I don't want a relationship with, simply because she makes me feel bad every time we're together by bringing up toxic things (or things that were toxic for her, anyway, and her memories are totally different from mine. She needs a counsellor, and I'm the last person who can sort this out for her), and she was making me a wreck. So I've had to put distance.

If your sister is annoyed at you because you two have differing political views, can't you just agree to disagree? Very toxic subject when there are disagreements within families.

Awe, that's so wonderful about your niece, Pinkie. You must keep up posted. And pictures, too!

Pinkie

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Pinkie in the Pink Palace
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Reply with quote  #28 
Actually I have similar distressing issues in my family too, Michele. Like Allan, my niece won't talk to her father anymore, nor will her half sister (he somehow got three women to marry him, I don't know how). This is the niece living with her boyfriend in Virginia. Their father apparently is a big selfish nothing, worried he might have to shell out a buck to help his children. He was raised kind of poor, but he's had a good job for a very long time  and his second two wives are rich, or at least quite affluent.  I heard talk he seems to prefer his two step sons to his daughters. That he always wanted sons, something stupid like that. I hope her boyfriend's Dad will be like a father to her; her stepfather is good to her. 
And my brother won't have anything to do with my other sister and me. He even let us fear he was being sued for everything he owned, which would affect us since our names were on the property too. Actually he was the one suing,  the car insurance company. I have a policy with them, too, and they're treating me like dirt 'cause of his action, will drop me from the policy in December. I feel insulted our brother won't come over, because all his friends moved away, and he's isolated and still won't reach out.  He claims it depresses him to see the house our late parents and he had lived in, but I'm not sure that's all it is.
It's a pisser when family members can't be close. As you pointed out, sometimes that's better than to experience something toxic.  To be self-protective, for one's peace of mind. It's a shame it has to be that way. 

__________________
"more sinned against than sinning"--shall be on my tombstone

"Transpersonal psychology--transcend the self, to abolish and avoid pain...what is the self, anyway?"--Pinkie
"Queen of Pain, I'll Always be Queen of Pain" (laughs)with apologies to Sting
"Yes it's over now, drink your big black cow, and get outa here"--Steely Dan
"I'm just a girl, they think I'm some kind of freak"--Gwen Stefani
"You can beat us with wires, you can beat us with chains;
You can make all your rules but you can't outrun the history train...I seen a glorious day"--Paul Simon
Gardener

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Reply with quote  #29 
Started working at a winery for what they call crush. I don't drink wine but I have always been curious about the process. The place I work at is at a large industrial scale but the process is the same. Very interesting the different methods they use for different types of grapes. There's a wide variety of people with different personality types but everyone seems friendly. They have different taste testers running around from all over the world running around tasting the different wines. This company gets wine from all kinds of different grape growers and mixes it to their wine makers specifications. Lots of hard work in a fairly short amount of time. Another friend owns a commercial alcohol still that makes all kinds of spirits and whiskey blends maybe I will get a chance to learn that process next.
Pinkie

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Pinkie in the Pink Palace
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Reply with quote  #30 
Gardiner, sounds like a cool job, glad you got that. Please let us know how it goes. It seems in tune with some of your major interests and enthusiasms.

Wished to clarify that my niece's father apparently is not very interested in her and his other daughter, doesn't seem to care about them much, or they'd want to speak to him. They didn't just want or need some money from him sometimes. They wanted him to love them and be a father.

__________________
"more sinned against than sinning"--shall be on my tombstone

"Transpersonal psychology--transcend the self, to abolish and avoid pain...what is the self, anyway?"--Pinkie
"Queen of Pain, I'll Always be Queen of Pain" (laughs)with apologies to Sting
"Yes it's over now, drink your big black cow, and get outa here"--Steely Dan
"I'm just a girl, they think I'm some kind of freak"--Gwen Stefani
"You can beat us with wires, you can beat us with chains;
You can make all your rules but you can't outrun the history train...I seen a glorious day"--Paul Simon
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